Grief is the whole of the emotional, cognitive and physical reactions a person has in response to a loss; it can follow not only a death but also other losses, such as the end of a relationship, the loss of a job or a change in health. Grief is not an illness but a natural response to loss; how it is experienced and how long it lasts vary from person to person.
Does grief occur only after a death?
No. According to the NHS, most people experience grief when they lose someone or something important to them; the loss may be the death of a loved one, but it may also be the end of a relationship, losing a job, moving home or someone close becoming seriously ill. Grief is the natural response a person has after losing a person, relationship, role or situation that matters to them.
Which reactions can occur during grief?
Reactions vary from person to person; not every example below needs to be seen in every person.
- Emotional reactions: sadness, longing, anger, guilt, shock or numbness
- Physical reactions: fatigue, changes in sleep and appetite
- Cognitive and behavioral reactions: difficulty concentrating; wanting to return quickly to daily life
The NHS notes that feelings may come and go, that powerful feelings can appear unexpectedly, and that a person may not immediately recognize grief as the reason for changes in how they feel or act. Some people experience intense emotions after a loss, while others may not feel their emotions for a long time; feelings can become prominent again on special days or in situations that serve as reminders. The expectations of others or pressure to “be strong” can make it harder to express emotions.
Are the stages of grief experienced in the same order by everyone?
The NHS lists denial, anger, depression, bargaining and acceptance as the stages of grief. The same source also states that a person may not experience all of them and that they may not come in a particular order. For this reason, the stages can be thought of not as a sequence everyone must follow but as a framework that tries to describe the experience of grief.
In a study that followed 233 bereaved people for 24 months (Maciejewski et al., 2007), the group-average peak order of the indicators was found to resemble the order predicted by the theory, but disbelief was not the first dominant indicator, and the most prominent negative indicator was yearning. These findings concern group averages; individual experiences may not follow this order.
How long does grief last?
There is no single duration that applies to everyone; it varies with the nature of the loss, the person’s life circumstances and their support network. The NHS states that intense feelings will ease over time, but it also adds that grief after a death can last many months or even years in some people, which may point to prolonged grief. If the intensity does not decrease and disrupts daily functioning, a professional evaluation can be considered.
When can grief be considered prolonged grief?
The NHS describes prolonged grief disorder as feelings that do not ease over months, constant thoughts about the person who died, difficulty accepting the death and being unable to return to everyday activities; it adds that it is more likely after traumatic, sudden or unexpected deaths. According to the American Psychiatric Association (APA), the DSM-5-TR (2022) requires, for this diagnosis, that at least one year has passed since the loss in adults (six months in children and adolescents), that at least three of the listed symptoms are present nearly every day for at least the past month, and that the grief exceeds social, cultural or religious norms and causes significant distress or impairment. The APA reports that persistent symptoms are seen in an estimated 4–15% of bereaved adults.
This information is for general information only; a diagnosis can be made only by a qualified professional.
How are grief and loss addressed in psychotherapy?
In psychotherapy, the person is offered a space where they can express their emotions in a safe setting; for how this setting is protected, see How are confidentiality and ethics protected? What the loss means to the person, the emotions experienced, the relationships left behind and the effects of the loss on daily life are explored together. Depending on the approach, thought patterns or the person’s relationship patterns may be addressed; for more information about the approaches, see What Is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)? and What Is Psychodynamic Psychotherapy?
The APA states that most grief does not require mental health treatment. For people whose symptoms persist, it lists CBT-based approaches, prolonged grief therapy and bereavement support groups among the evidence-based options.
How can a person take care of themselves during grief?
The NHS mentions sharing feelings with a friend, family member, health professional or counselor, meeting others who have similar experiences, regular exercise and regular meals, and setting small, achievable goals; it advises avoiding alcohol, cigarettes, gambling or drugs as a way of coping. This information is general and does not replace a personal evaluation.
Common misconceptions about grief
- “Grief is an illness.” Grief is a natural response to loss; however, if its intensity does not decrease and it impairs functioning, it may need to be evaluated.
- “Grief is completed by passing through certain stages in order.” The NHS states that the stages may not come in a particular order and that not all of them may be experienced.
- “Grief should end within a certain time.” There is no single duration that applies to everyone; feelings can become prominent again on special days or in situations that serve as reminders.
- “Being strong means not showing emotions.” The expectation to “be strong” can make it harder to express emotions; sharing feelings can be a natural part of grief.
When can psychological support be considered?
Psychological support can be considered if intense emotions do not ease for a long time, significantly affect the person’s daily functioning or relationships, or if the person feels alone and helpless; for general criteria, see When can psychological support be considered? The NHS recommends seeing a doctor for symptoms of prolonged grief, when struggling with stress, anxiety or low mood, when low mood lasts more than two weeks, and when self-help efforts are not enough. For symptoms of low mood, see What Are Depressive Symptoms and How Are They Addressed in Psychotherapy?
If a person has thoughts of harming themselves or ending their life, they do not need to carry these alone; telling someone they trust and contacting a health facility is recommended. If there is an immediate danger, the 112 Emergency Call Center in Türkiye can be contacted or the nearest hospital emergency department can be visited; whenever possible, it is important that the person is not left alone.
Expert note
Grief is often approached through the question “how long until it ends”; in clinical work, however, what the loss means to the person, the nature of the relationship with the person or situation that was lost, and the place of the loss within the person’s own life story also matter. The same loss can be experienced in very different ways by two people.
A perspective that draws on cognitive behavioral and psychodynamic theories considers thoughts, emotions, behaviors and relationship patterns together. Which approach, or which combination, is suitable usually becomes clear only after an evaluation process; the information in this article does not replace that evaluation.
Clinical Psychologist Özgün Emre Yaylacı
Frequently asked questions
How long does grief last?
There is no single duration that applies to everyone. It varies with the nature of the loss, the person’s life circumstances and their support network; the NHS notes that in some people grief after a death can last many months or even years.
Is grief an illness?
No. Grief is a natural response to loss. If its intensity does not decrease and it impairs daily functioning, a professional evaluation can be considered.
Are the stages of grief experienced in the same order by everyone?
No. The NHS states that not all stages may be experienced and that they may not come in a particular order. The stages can be thought of as a framework that describes the experience rather than as a road map.
When is grief considered “prolonged grief”?
According to the DSM-5-TR, at least one year since the loss in adults (six months in children and adolescents) and the persistence of certain symptoms are required; the APA notes that this is reported in an estimated 4–15% of bereaved adults. A diagnosis can be made only by a qualified professional.
Can grief be addressed in psychotherapy?
It is possible to work with people who are experiencing grief and loss in psychotherapy. The suitability of an approach is determined by the person’s needs, reason for seeking help and clinical evaluation.
Sources
This article is intended for general information; the following sources were consulted during its preparation (the Turkish-language source is marked, the others are in English):
- NHS (UK National Health Service): Grief, bereavement and loss
- American Psychiatric Association (APA): Prolonged Grief Disorder
- Maciejewski, P. K., Zhang, B., Block, S. D. and Prigerson, H. G. (2007): An empirical examination of the stage theory of grief. JAMA, 297(7), 716–723
- T.C. Sağlık Bakanlığı, Giresun İl Sağlık Müdürlüğü (Turkish Ministry of Health, Giresun Provincial Health Directorate): Hangi Durumlarda 112 Aranmalıdır? (in Turkish)
This article was prepared by Clinical Psychologist Özgün Emre Yaylacı. Last updated: October 23, 2026. The content is for general information only and does not constitute diagnosis, treatment or personal guidance.
